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A mind traveller. Pretty much an abstract and eccentric human being. But overall, a human panda who embraces food as a hobby.

Sunday, June 29, 2014

Ramadhan Kareem

Salam Ramadhan to my brothers and sisters :)

May this blessed journey be a wonderful one for all of us.

The first day of Ramadhan and here I am posting a long post after so many (endless) delays. Thank God it is Sunday so I get to fully enjoy the first day with my family.

So what is Ramadhan? Why is every Muslims in the world anticipating this month of fasting? 
Abstaining from food and drinks ? Some people wonder, why do we anticipate this?

Ramadhan is more than just abstaining from food and drinks. It is the journey towards a better ummah and individual. One not only abstain from food but also abstaining from bad behaviour. During the month of Ramadhan, syaitan (satan) is chained every single one of em, the big and the small. What is left of Ramadhan? Full blessings and only you. Yes. YOU and ONLY YOU, are the reason to your every bad behaviour. You start to realize 

"Masya Allah, how did I do such things? Syaitan is not around, and I could do such things?"

When you realize this, then you start to act in performing better deed. This is right. You realize at this month, the need for you to stop everything and performing deeds become easier as ever. But that does not mean, you do all this once a year. Ramadhan is not the month of training, it is the month where we can enjoy doing such positive acts without a problem. Ramadhan is actually our freedom month. Where we can happily be the Muslim and Muslimah that we dreamed of. The other months are the training months, that teach you to fight off the syaitans and most importantly yourself. 

To some, Ramadhan acts as platform towards becoming a better person. It's okay. Begin now if you are on your way. If you have that niat in you, then start it. I will be the first person to support you and endorse you to chase this blessed month. 

Wallahi, I feel such at ease when Ramadhan comes. Do you feel like when Ramadhan arrives, you feel so secure and so complete. It's like Allah SWT has wrapped a blanket to all of His loved slaves, and He does not discriminate. Aren't we ever so lucky to feel this joy? Alhamdullilah. I am blessed to have this chance to be here with my 24th time of Ramadhan. 

As I type this post, I can't help but to hold back tears of happiness and blessed journey. I am so happy to be given a chance to celebrate Ramadhan with the people I love and to feel it again eventhough I have experienced it numerous times, and to know that each Ramadhan I am given such opportunity to be a better Muslim. So here I type this post, to wish all my brothers and sisters a splendid journey ahead. 

Before I end this, Here are some things I wish to leave a message. 

-Whenever you feel like you have the feel to do something negative, hold back and think, I have no one to blame but myself. No syaitans no influence, what is left is me. Am I really sure about this?

There is no one but yourself that walks towards the path of Jannah or Jahanam. Straighten up your path. Let the compass of His blessings guide you, and make steps that lead you to the right journey.

Ramadhan Mubarak everyone! It's just so good to be back!

p/s: Dear Ramadhan, welcome home :)

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

White Horse

Today I feel a pain in the heart.
Sort of an ache. I refuse to feel the pain. But then I feel my eyes started to gather lil teardrops.
My mind is pushing the ache away, but my heart is sending out a signal to every part of me telling me it is hurting.
It's nothing really. The reason behind to why I feel so today. To be honest, it is a small thing.
But somehow, I feel like the starting point of yesterday, hit the point where all the aches before this was hidden.
Suddenly, it starts back the wound that I keep to myself. I don't know whether I should stop feeling so, and just heal it back, by myself, on my own like I always do.
Just let it be and acknowledge it for a while. Let the pain feel for itself and let it remind me that sometimes, I can't afford to heal it on my own. That it is okay to feel so.

Sometimes you can forgive. But to forget is the hardest.
How can you forget when you feel the pain?
I feel such pain and I end up staring long down the road, thinking if I should just put the pain away, or gather up the courage and just heal it on my own. Like I always do.
Sometimes its funny how much love can make you go through lengths.
How love can let you hurt and yet you still go on with it, it hurts but you keep loving.
To be honest, love is never a rainbow and sprinkles.
But this love brings you to your feet and tell you, that someway somehow, it's just bumps and you will make it through. Not alone. Not alone. But right there with the one that holds you strongly next to him.

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Need escape

I need a holiday. Lets just go and find a beach and stay and see the beach. The sound of the beach is so nice.
Wanna know how sad I am ? Sad referring to me being a pathetic soul.
Listening to the sound of the beach on spotify.
and imagine i am there and then cry when i open my eyes i am at the office
I need a break from life. haven't visit the beach properly since last year T_T

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Bad in distance

I was never this "manja" neither was I a distance freak. But I turned one the moment I am with him. Suprisingly, he stays and love me still. He amazed me in so many ways, when I thought I was suppose to guide him through this relationship thingy, since as quoted "you are way more experienced than me" by him.

I am so bad with distance. I guess there is a reason why, I am here staying close to him. God knows am that bad with distance. He is The Most Merciful. He knows best. Right now, I miss that boy.
And my emotions go haywire at this moment.

I am suprised on how love can turn us to be so human. When love turns you into a human, thats when you know you are confident being yourself. Only God knows how hard it is that both of us are going through our days till the time comes. People can judge, but we are the one passing through each day, holding one another through it all. May God bless us and to all others out there, it will be hard now, but stay strong, as one day it will be worth it.

P/s: our fights will be ours. Others need not to understand, as long as we and Him know how it is

Saturday, June 7, 2014


I am pretty much swamped with *checks schedule* sleeping.
Since work started. I have lack of sleep. 35km away from home every day.
DUDE. aku tak biasa lagi.
So currently, enjoying every bits of the weekend till Monday.
Oh no, don't get me wrong. I love my job. It is just that with work, we have this long-distance relationship.
I have to drive 35km just to be in love with work. Darn.
So if any of you people know anybody who is finding for a roomate living in Bangi or Putrajaya. Beep me in the comment box. I can't take the distance. SO SLEEPY.

Oh le beau is going away merantauing utara to Melaka this coming two weeks for his uni programme. Imma krai myself now and count the calendar till he is in the same state as me.
Yeah, mengada liddat. Will update properly soon. Ciao.

p/s: brain is producing some literature piece. So watch this space.