About Me

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A mind traveller. Pretty much an abstract and eccentric human being. But overall, a human panda who embraces food as a hobby.

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Because there is up and down

Lucky - Jason Mraz & Colbie Caillat

Today I like to say am very lucky. I've been lucky since the day I met him.
No matter our ups and down. I learn to love better, live better and smile better.
It will be a rough road till the day comes. But for now, we start to treasure the very sweet little things.
I believe everything will be worth while when the day finally comes.
Because only the both of us knows, what we went through

P/s: Always 'Lucky'

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Live, breathe and smile.

Living breathing and smiling. 
Seems easy but truth is, nothing is easy. 
Living requires you to go through life everyday. There will be ups and down. Roller coaster emotions. 
Breathing. Not everyday we breathe easy. At one point of life, breathing becomes so hard, that we can feel that we are holding ourselves together to just take a breath. Sometimes, we breathe too fast, that we forget to breathe all, one at a time. 
Smiling. The very essence of life. Truth be told, smiling is what all of us need. But then again, life doesn't promise us smiles everyday. Smiling only requires a few muscles. But then again, no one wants to smile when they don't want to, because that will be the hardest thing to do. Like forcing ourselves to hold a weight at our face.

These three are the thing that we keep in mind everyday. But we end up forgetting it, and when we fall, we asked thousands of time, why is it so hard to live, breathe and smile. We keep it at the back of our head, that only when we managed to breathe in slowly, we remember, life is never easy. It is just the matter of how we live it. Do you know what drives us to live? Love.

The essence of life. The spirit of life. Everyone of us falls in love and falls out of love. But this very essence, either helps us to stand tall or take us away on our feet and fall straight to the ground. Nevertheless, each one of us loves, for a reason. God, family, loved ones and friends. This will drives us to live and breathe and smile every single day. Love the power that tells us, life will be worth it, breathing will be as clear as taking in the fresh air of the day and smiling will be endless. Live everyday, tell ourselves that we love ourselves and then loving others. But never forget to hold The great love to The One that brings us to this world with His permission. The root of love comes from The One that never stopped loving us even though we turned away many times. When I am typing this, suddenly life seems easy. Suddenly life make sense. Love is the very essence of living, breathing and smiling.

I stand today, writing this to tell people out there, who is searching everyday for a will to drive through every challenges that they face. The moment you feel like everything seems hard, and you are at the verge of giving up. Don't. Believe that every hardship will have the happy ending.
I stand today telling you, that if you believe that you can go far. You'll be surprise of how He takes very good care of you. You only have to believe and keep loving. Because like you, I fall so often, but I tell myself, there will be good in every bad, and I never lost hope. And clearly, I am smiling at the end of the day, right now, hoping that each one of you finds the will to believe and live stronger. I know I found mine, and not letting go and keep loving will always drives me to live better.

So, begin to love Him, The One that loves endlessly and giving us this permission to love others. Then, take the next step to love ourselves before others. You'll be surprise how love can take you far, far in life. Easy to breathe and smiling without a doubt while standing strong on the ground with the ones you love.

p/s: Love. Goes a long way. 

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Never a machine

Have you ever feel so broken, to the point that even tears cannot describe how broken you are?
Even pain can't make you to cry, and words can't even describe properly how the tortured feeling is?
All that is left for you to feel is just..pain and empty.
Pain is when the heart is ripping every moment, even when you don't ask for it. The open wound keeps on hurting and knives keep on forcing through.
Empty because you are too broken to even know the difference of being happy and being sad. You smile for the sake of facial movements and to satisfy people.
Tears doesn't exists anymore, because you got used to the pain that even tears can't help to soothe you.
For a second you feel like the world is shunning you away.
Truth is, your heart is starting to shun it's way, from pain.

But the miracle thing about love is. Love makes you to go past through the pain, to believe that it will bring you up and bring you closer.
Love and pain. How can love feel the pain? How can pain exists in love?

Friday, February 14, 2014

'Cause If I could see your face once more'

All I Want - Kodaline

All I want is nothing more
To hear you knocking at my door
'Cause if I could see your face once more
I could die a happy man I'm sure

When you said your last goodbye
I died a little bit inside
I lay in tears in bed all night
Alone without you by my side

But If you loved me
Why'd you leave me?
Take my body
Take my body
All I want is,
And all I need is
To find somebody.
I'll find somebody like you.

So you brought out the best of me,
A part of me I'd never seen.
You took my soul and wiped it clean.
Our love was made for movie screens.

But If you loved me
Why'd you leave me?
Take my body,
Take my body.
All I want is,
And all I need is
To find somebody.
I'll find somebody.

It breaks my heart to hear such beautiful melody, relates so much to the emotions. But the difference is, I am never finding for somebody.
I never did. Because I found one. The one.
Thing is right now, 
I am waiting.
And I am patiently waiting. 

p/s: everyday is like knives piercing through the heart deeper and deeper. 

Thursday, February 13, 2014


One can only do so much when the other refuse to give in. 
Have you ever made to feel like you are being tossed around and picked whenever you are wanted?
Well, it happens. 
But never let that kill your hopes and faith. Don't. 

beside you

How can you tell that someone, you love them, even they are miles away?
They say hearts can speak even as distance separates.
Heart is breaking. But I fight through it all, every day to tell the one I love, I am standing strong.
I need help.
I need help.
I need help.
God please help me through.
I am fighting for someone I believe that means everything to me.

p/s : i need to breathe

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Once upon memories

Once upon a dream - Lana Del Ray

I love to believe when I walk with the sands at my feet. I love to believe your smiles are next to me.
I love to believe everytime I do something, you will be there to tell me it is wrong, it is something you'll laugh at or something you'll smile at. I walk every pace with you next to me. Even as it is, I never walked any pace faster nor slower, but my pace remains the same with you next to me.
But then my vision of reality scars me, the moment I open my eyes. I lost your smiles, your laughter, your whining, your lectures, your presence in reality. I turn around only to see myself, alone, dreaming of memories I wish that could be my friend for all eternity.
But here I am alive.
Here I am with my eyes open.
I want my dreams to be reality.
I want reality to create more memories.
I want to be with you for all that I can remember. 

p/s: tore me to pieces. rip me apart. I'll stay here with this pieces till you see me again.

Monday, February 10, 2014

Need you now

Tiada duka yang abadi - Opick

Sometimes things don't go your way. For one second, do not fall down. Do not give up.
Don't let this become the reason you should stop. Stand up. Close your eyes. He is with you. Take a deep breath, He is listening, He is watching over you. 

I learn that sometimes things don't go your way. Things don't go as planned. and that you are a human being.
What if you lost the one you love along the way? It does not mean you should give up. No. It does not mean I should give up too.
If only you know how much I love you. If only you know how much I am standing strong for you.
But I can't show you now. So I let Him do it for me, and let time help you. You are pretty much John Watson. Angry with the fact that I have made you angry. Angry with the fact I hurt you. But one day, even after months, we will be back smiling. 
I pray you will see it one day. Like Mary Watson I will wait. I still have dreams with you and I want to make it through. 

So I will let you breathe and see when you can. I will always be here, waiting like I always do.