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A mind traveller. Pretty much an abstract and eccentric human being. But overall, a human panda who embraces food as a hobby.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

10 things

I am trying here.
I don't have any idea whether he sees it. God. If he's not the one, please tell me soon. I wanna set my heart free. It is no use trying if I keep breaking and healing by myself along the way. It sucks to try to even like someone else, when I keep seeing him. No. He's not my ex. He's a guy that made me fell so deep. I am trying to tell myself everytime. Reasoning with my heart, that he's worth the fall. My heart keep doing the wrong moves. So what my brain said. But when my heart is at peace, the brain sends a signal that my heart is hurting. So which one is real? 

Hey boy,
If only you know, how deep I fall. I will keep on trying. I am getting tired, I know. But somehow, my heart isn't.
I hate the fact that my heart sees only you.
I hate the fact that everytime I wanna ignore these feelings you came and made me smile
I hate the fact that when I wanna try to move on, I can feel my heart being pulled back
I hate the fact when there is someone else wants to try, I can't give a chance to them
I hate the fact that I have to pretend this is okay when it is not.
I hate the fact that I see myself trying this hard.
I hate the fact that I am human when I am with you.
I hate the fact that I can see you in my life
I hate the fact that I am falling this deep for you
I hate the fact that this is real

I'm tired. :'( I'm weak but I pretend am not. God please make me strong. I'm trying. I'm trying.

p/s: just send this message to him through the wind through the moon. whatever way it can. Shit. I'm a pathetic girl when I'm here. Hopeless romantic. Hopeless.

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