About Me

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A mind traveller. Pretty much an abstract and eccentric human being. But overall, a human panda who embraces food as a hobby.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

bila saya *gasp* melihat kamu

Saya rasa macam serba bosan dan serba takde kerja. Padahal kan. Kerja tak nak berderet pula. Naik menyampah tengok. tapi terlalu penat nak buat. apa tah lagi nak usha. So saya procrastinate. dalam bahasa melayu, melengah-lengahkan kerja. Tapi bila pikir balik, sbnarnye kerja da siap pon. Tapi sentiasa rasa macam tak abis. Susah jadik orang yang ada attitude nearly perfectionist. Kenapa nearly? sbb saya jenis yang almost perfectionist tapi takde la gila perfectionist. Lepas tu, saya ingin berkata satu dua benda iaitu, 

a) awak, muka awak macam Dermot Mulroney. saya akan *gasp* bila lihat awak. tapi mati smpai situ je la. sbb saya dengan awak. nak berhangan together. memang tak dapek la. awak high atas di sana *nun atas sana* saya low di sini (eh jap tak nak la low, hinanya) middle lah. saya middle sahajoh. jauhnyeee. :( haih.

b) kalau perkataan 'what if' boleh jadik kenyataan. sukanye saya

c) saya ada 4 benda nak kene settle yang buat diri nie rasa cm haram gila nak mati punya penat. padahal takde la penat mana. cuma mental saya da terlalu penat nak function. 

d) ada 7 hari lagi. friends. please remember this day and start doing countdown. :D

e) saya nak boipreng satu. bagi saya please! okay. statement. melampau.

f) HEY mana kamu nieh? jalan tak nak lembap lagi ke? penat la tunggu :(

p/s: saya da penat tunggu.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Hidup terlalu puitis kadang kadang

Hari ini sebab da terlalu bosan. Jadik tekan la mouse dan pergi blogwalking. Tetibe terlintas di blog seorang wanita yang hebat berpuisi. Sapa lagi kalau bukan kak fynn jamal. Tapi hati ini pedih kalau lalu di blog kak fynn. Bukan apa, tapi kalau lalu situ, mesti terigat pada seorang pujangga yang amat meminati kak fynn. Tapi perasaan pedih tu bak kata mat salleh, temporary je lah. Tapi terfikir, aku nie dulu, semata kerana dia, notes kat facebook ngan blog, tak nak sakan pula penuh dengan segala puisi untuk si dia nie. tapi apakan daya. mati situ je la. Cuma kelakar kalau tengok balik. ilham yang datang tu boleh buat kita tulis 1001 perkataan yang puitis jadiknya bila bercinta (bercinta ke? tak kot. suka ja) tapi sekarang ilham da mati.so konklusinye, takde pape pon. saje nak luah perasaan kecundang tatkala lalu blog kak fynn. macam biasa, kak fynn puisi2 dia menusuk kalbu. tapi hati nie da lama tertusuk oleh si dia. so dah tertanam jauh ke dalam lubuk tanah. da sampai satu ketika, da malas nak gali balik. simpan dan duduk diam2 sudah. dan kepada si pujangga, kalau dia baca lah (itupon kalau dia kesah aku da tukar link ke belum)

awak inspirasi saya dulu tahu?
kini dah takde la kot. kita pon takda apa apa.
sudah mati di jalan hidup kisah kita. lama dulu. lama dulu. 

p/s: seumpama rindu berpuisi.

This isn't gonna work

I am too occupied with work that I forgot how to smile.
Very much lovely isn't it?
Well I thought I was running away from something, but I was wrong, there was nothing to run away from. I guess I was scared to feel anything whether it's happiness or sadness. I just want to feel nothing. So when I thought that filling my life with work can make me feel more ignorant. I was wrong. 
I start to care the reasons I went through that. The cause that have made me reach a point where I can't accept being in a state that involves me being ignorant.
and I think along the way, I built a wall, standing so tall and so strong, that I forgot to make a backup plan of how to destroy it, in case I didn't want it anymore. 
So it stands there. 
Still does. 
Life is not easy for me lately. So if I ever say no to many times to anyone, or went away from anyone. 
It's not that I hate you or avoiding you
but I am kind of avoiding myself. 
Funny how life can make jokes for you but you are not laughing. 

Monday, February 21, 2011

Jakarta Jazz Festival 11'

I take that back
I saw Jakarta's Jazz Festival ad at Air Asia.
I stopped and stare and questions. Why does Jakarta's Jazz Festival ALWAYS have awesome lineups?
Malaysia punya takde pon :(
They have George Benson, Santana, and Corrine Bailey Rae! HOW AWESOME is that?
Yes if you're wondering. I am a big fan of Jazz music genre. I LOVE it.
MALAYSIA! start doing one in KL. annnd! call great lineups! asyik sunburst je bosan la :(

p/s: I saw Los Amigos and Killamanjaro. these are the kind of concerts I can drag my mom and dad along with :(


I'm finally breathing properly. Alhamdullilah :)
Thank God the hectic week passed by. All I need to do now is to enjoy. okay not enjoy but lay back juuuuust for a while. I FEEL SO HAPPAYH. but i have no topics to say
for now just telling you guys whats up. BYE :D
go have fun with the last few days of february.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

It's a high fall

Hi guys! 
How's life? 

any hard bits here and there?
no worries! :) it's end of february, if by end of it you're smiling that means it's not that bad after all ;) So I promised to update till you guys got bored of me. But forgive me. I've been occupying myself with works and assignment. 
My advice for the day is never put more burden on yourself when you know you have too much on your hands. 
It's hard when you are too strong then you can't even feel weak for a second. It's like forcing yourself to go more than what you can. It's hard. Believe me. oh and one more thing. never ask to be perfect. always be grateful for what you have and who you are. Being perfect is not that happy or joyful. It's so hard as when you're used to having a perfect life, when one thing goes wrong, You can fall down and break to pieces. And let me tell you, that fall is a high fall. So no, don't wonder how it feels. You would never want to feel how the pain feels like. Okay guys! pretty much thats it. So go have a great day ahead and enjoy the last days of february! treat em well and always love yourself ;)

p/s: always stand up when you fall. dont stay put. 

Saturday, February 19, 2011

If only

Sometimes I pray to be strong
but never too strong
because when I'm too strong
Its so hard to allow yourself to be a lil weak
When you're holding too much at one time
you just want to let go some but you can't
and then everything kills you.
When it's too much
this is what happens.

p.s: i want to try my best to be strong, but at times I just want to break down and cry

Thursday, February 10, 2011

When capital letters meet in between, ridiculous decides to tag along.

"KiTe TaK ReTi lA NaK tYpE peSeN CmNiE,,,,,"

The meaning of the sentence does not matter, though the use of capital letters are questioned.When you saw this on your news feed from certain friends of yours (not your friend, but friend of a friend) or maybe when you go to certain pages that you liked, and you saw these type of comments, you will suddenly stop and look at that comment. No you're not stalking at their content of comments but rather looked 'amazed' at how they type that way, and wonders 

"WHY la this people even bother to type like that?" 

and to some, looking at that kind of comments gives you temporary entertainment seeing how ridiculous it is. 
No one, I repeat no one, will even bother with the content of the comment because it's too unique. Sebab terlalu terpegun, dengan skill mereka yang sebegitu, so ape salahnye, try la sekejap.

I tell you, the moment I try to type that into my twitter/facebook wall. 
Took me 1 minute or more, trying and trying to use it in a fast way, but failed. My hand kept touching the backspace cause suddenly, I feel ridiculous. Seumpama mereka ini menghadirkan diri ke course-course yang khas untuk mereka yang suka bebenor type seperti ini. 

Please. Please. TELL ME. how do you some of you, who does type like this. How did you managed to input this into your life. Especially in communication like text messaging and social networking.
Don't tell me, we didn't learn the proper way to type. 
In English they gave you punctuation rules.
In Bahasa Melayu, the same thing applies. 

For the sake of everyone and communication especially, I recommend you to not do that or implement that. 
It's nowhere near cool. You can lead to miscommunication, as from what I know, when you use capital letters, it's either, that object or word you're describing is a 'kata nama khas' (forgive me I forgot whats it called in English) or if you used capital letters on each letters in a word, you're emphasizing something.
for example : 

Words like Porsche, Samsung, Toshiba, Japan, or Malaysia. Shah. Julia
Yes these are 'kata nama khas' and these are better than : 

Words like: KiTeW, MAkAn, EsOk, BilIk 
these are NOT even a brand or a country or a name. It's just a noun and verbs. that does not need capital letters several times

When you're doing that in between words, (the use of capital letters) people can't tell what you're emphasizing or that you're quite weak in your punctuation knowledge.

Words like : "WHAT?? I will NOT repeat this again"
these are used to emphasize. If you want to capitalized everything, capital these way. these are more more more acceptable than this

"ApE YanG KaU caKaP niE conFUsE lA" 
(sapa yang tak confuse when you're trying to figure out what does the last word mean. please tell me does the last word mean ia? or la? APA BENDA NIE ? -.-)

Please for sake of others and for the sake of language. I don't care bahasa melayu or bahasa inggeris. 
Please just don't do this or influence this on society.
This issue is just the same as the 'EwW' issue by inianwarhadi. (for some of you who knows him, if not click on youtube, that's his channel) 
Language is not meant for you guys to jeopardize, it's a mediaum of communication, when you start to mess around with that, communication seems so difficult lately.
and DON'T EVER tell me this is Manglish.
Manglish is mix of both Bahasa Melayu and English into one sentence, and capital letters of that kind is NEVER apart of the manglish features.
Manglish is our society's unique language based on what sociolinguists see.
so please. Don't make us Malaysians look like a retard. 
So when I say I'm amazed and that people stopped to look at your comments
that does not mean we ADORE you're style/method of typing.
instead we might laugh and wonder how ridiculous that looks like. -.-
So till here. 

'Bahasa jiwa bangsa'
Jika itu cara anda menggambarkan bahasa anda. 
Jiwa anda bukan main kompleks lagi.
Bahasa pun terus tunggang-langgang.
Jadi adakah itu jua jiwa anda? 
Yang pasti itu bukan jiwa bangsa saya!

p.s: this ridiculousity has to stop

Wednesday, February 9, 2011


It's almost a week since I last blog about something.
Well momentarily, I am out of ideas or topic to talk about.
As my brain are eroded with too much knowledge. 
Hence all I can imagine in my head is all the journals, articles and books that I have read. Which I think you wouldn't want to know or read it from here. So hence, I just drop by to say HELLO!
How's february treating ya'all?
My start of february been goood alhamdullilah. 
So nothing much. 
Though I just wish to chant
YNWA! YNWA! we are making way to the top gradually! :) 
We're back! thanks to the Reds and especially King Kenny!
Okay that is pretty much it. Wait for thursday for more topic. 
Eleh. cm ada je orang baca -.-
I just need to get all the assignments done, which is after thursday.
then insya allah I will blog till you guys get sick of me :P

Thursday, February 3, 2011

This is something to jiggy with it

Heard of Kenny G before?
George Benson?
Lionel Richie?
Wham or George Michael?
then if you do recognize/familiar with these names, congratulationnnnnns! you are a 80's/90's kid!

Awesome tak zaman dulu. takde yang pelik2 seumpama lady gagak itu. almost all the songs at that era are not as weird as it is now. Heck, we even have a hard time trying to buy the album as there were so many choices of good (wait a min) great singers back then. Oh Oh! plus, time tu, lagu pon takda la pening kepala nak dengar, smpai separuh orang berkata, seangkatan lagu memuja illuminati. Yes. lagu zaman dulu, sexayh sedia adanye tanpa perlu video klip seperti ali di handro. yang membuatkan kita sendiri terbeliakkan biji bola mata, smpaikan nak terkeluar, bukan kerana terangsang, tetapi meluat dan terlalu terkezut. yezah. 

So what's the deal with me talking about this? Nothing much. I just wanna share my recent playlist which i just heard for the past few days. I turned oldies yaw!

So here, I tell you, I am listening to.

George Benson Greates hits

Lionel Richie Greatest hits

Careless Whisper by George Michael

and Kenny G's Greatest Hits

Please if you have the free time, mari la kita mendengar lagu lagu yg oldies dan soulful ini dari dengar lagu yang mengatakan dirinya Wild dan sexay seumpama lagu Miley Cyrus, dan lagu seangkatan dengannye, mahupun lagu Rihanna yang asyik bertanyakan What's My Name, macam dia da kene amnesia kan, al maklumlah dulu da kene hentak kuat sangat. Ops. Sorry rihanna. yeah. Like 21353 other people in this world does not hit you up with that sarcastic jokes. So yeap! Try listen to em. nice change of environment. 
So that is all for now. I have to do my assignments in the first place, but I ended up here. LOL.
I leave you with Mr Kenny G and Brian Mcknight with Careless Whisper.

p/s: when I get my car, don't bother trying to change the songs that I play unless I give the permission so, cause for all I know, my CD collections will all be from 80's or 90's or Lite.fm on the radio.

WARNING: This means manglish everywhere.

I'm back ya'll! for shizzle my nizzle.
I think I want to stop trying to be elegant. Penat la ya'll.
Me no like that.
Say whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?
Let's see.
ai nak sepik like how I want ya see?
so ain't nobody gonna tell me what to say here. Cause it's my place ya dig?

Okay dah dah la cukup merepek.
Cita kat sini is that I want to stay as I am before. I blog for my own sake. For my own opinion. If i try to be like some emo shit. you can click the x button and move away to another blog. Because I realized I was trying to blog to impress people, which by all means, it sucks like (insert specific words) so there you go. I penat taw ya'all tahu. I da tak kesaaaah da pon apa ya'all nak cakap pasni. I da tak peduli if ya'all cakap

"Eh come on la, you're a (insert my course here) student, be proper with your english!"
"Please don't make us (insert some english course here) students look like a retard who does not want to speak proper english"

Eh. kalau lu punya pakai cakap ada manglish. tok sah dok mai kat I cakap I should type proper english at my own blog.
and plus. I don't represent anyone la! thats the thing. I do not represent my course in any blogs.
this is me just ranting at my own place. you no dig. you go away la
I pedih telinga dengar taw. bukan i tak taruk caution sign. i did taw.
Tsk tsk typical people.
(the dialogues are just made up dialogues as I made themselves up and never refer it to anyone whether dead or alive :D HEHE )
I mean you can speak manglish. no harm done, just make sure like i said in my old blog.

"There is nothing wrong in trying to insert some manglish in whatever you speak or write (please don't apply this for formal stuff as I will not be the one responsible for that mistake some of you made) as long as it's not obvious that you do not know totally how to speak/spell in english. We are who we are bak kata kesha. We malays who speaks manglish. thats our specialty" -myself

Okay thats the truth. I penat taw nak try cakap proper english. You ingat i baguih sangat ka? tak ponn. I tak cakap begitu. So, if you are disgusted already by reading this post, as i do not look like a proper english student, you can click the x button. yeap nobody is stopping you. :D
So there you go. I shall go crazy on my blog and be looosen up! dan bukan loose seluar! ops! (okay tak lawak di situ)
So here we go! Let's welcome the freedom in me and the ranting life of Shaf!

p/s: this post has no relation to yg hidup or mati as I just feel like ranting at this ungodly hour. LOL!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Just a dream

I wish some part of my life will not stay as just a dream
I'm tired of smiling seeing others happy
I want that too.
I do get that feelings but I choose to ignore it
when in reality, I do feel it at times.
No matter how I ignore it.
but in the same time I am too scared to be near anything
I wish no more broken things
no more lost
no more tears
whatever happens, after this
i only wish for one that knows just what this heart wants
and I pray that he knows just what I am
and loves me just as I am.

p/s:I'm tired of thinking can it be true

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Kops say we can, so we'll never walk alone!

I am busy starting my hols with works yes.
not assignments
but rather like, future work.
takde la.
I am only updating myself on the hot topic and crazy transfer deadline news of the season!
yes football. of course. apa lagi yg bertransfer.
it's crazy because the world class top player cost less than the dude who just scored 11 goals
of course this story revolves around Liverpool because I am a big fan of the Reds and since I know Liverpool better than other epl clubs.
so Liverpool decides to buy Andy Carroll who scored less than 20 and who is a British man, sum of money of 35million where else, Luis Suarez, a top world cup scorer and who a scored 111 out of 159 appearances during his time in Ajax and yes he is also the captain of the team, cost only 22.7million!
So I want to see Carroll be worth the money the owner spend on him.
Anyway, Suarez and Carroll will be wearing jersey number 7 and 9 respectively on their shirts.
Torres on the other hand decides to join Chelsea who he said 'it is an honour to play in one of the biggest club in europe' which made me snort at that statement. So goodbye Torres, been an honour to have you around.
You served the club well.
For Suarez and Carroll.
Hoorah hoorrah. you have our support
from now on, you'll never walk alone, never walk alone!
Facts of the day : Luis Suarez was the most happiest person to perform medical checkup when he knows that he's doing that for Liverpool. Now THAT is what I call REDS SPIRIT! :) I can sense he comes to Liverpool for the right reasons. HOORAH!

p/s: I wonder how the Kop fans are going to welcome chelsea especially torres on the next upcoming game Liverpool vs Chelsea. which is after the stoke game